Getting the 5.30pm train from Birmingham New Street is always a complete pain in the bum. You have to squeeze through crowds that hog the platform, overtake the slow walkers without knocking into them whilst dodging the people walking towards you, and find the right carriage to get on. What a load of stress to take just to ensure you reach your destination!
What makes it even more stressful is the rude and oblivious passengers. How many times have you got onto a busy train to find that several seats have been filled by people’s luggage? How on earth can they justify prioritising their baggage over a person?
This is one the most frustrating and daily annoyances I now face. I asked a woman politely to move up so that I could take the “free” seat. She looked at her bag and then back at me with an appalled expression. The cowbag was actually annoyed that I made such a request and there I was frustrated for even having to ask. She left her backpack on the floor but moved the other bag to the overhead storage (that’s right the overhead storage where anything without a pulse ought to be in the first place) and moved her oversized arse out of her seat. She expected me to climb over her bag and squeeze through the gap to the window seat.
Being as courteous as I am I attempted to climb over her bag to the seat. It wasn’t my most flattering moment and I knocked my knee against the arm rest which she hadn’t lifted for me. I sat down flushed, in pain and angry but said absolutely nothing. Deep inside I was fuming and so I stared out the window imagining scenarios which involved me destroying her superior and selfish attitude. I became so livid I wrote a text to my friend which started with a two lined insult I had prepared for the middle aged grumpy woman. The remainder of the text explained my predicament. To my delight, my friend thought I was insulting him at a glance of the message and after reading the rest of it he replied with “Started reading that and thought I’d p**sed you off… was very impressed to see such cold and witty words from you Miss Marsh…”
Well I may be a coward, I may never get a chance to use my insult, but my friend agreed with me; if I was to make such a remark, I’d have nuked every last bit of superiority off that woman’s face. Sometimes the best remedy is not to confront but to moan.
I’m far too polite to write the insult but take a look here for a picture of the message. Apologies if anyone find it rude, I was absolutely furious in my defense!